On the Power of Self-Affirmation

I began reading Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.’s Strength to Love, a collection of his sermons, several years ago. I had been inspired to do this from personal failure, however, the underlying, both proximate and specific, reason was that I desired to read the words OF an exceptionally inspiring individual, not, simply, ABOUT them. Autobiography would have served that purpose, however, Rev. Dr. King, Jr. was assassinated before he had the opportunity to publish that book, although the equally powerful The Autobiography of Martin Luther King, Jr. was compiled by editor Clayborne Carson of Rev. Dr. King, Jr.’s and his wife, Coretta Scott King’s, writings to “ameliorate” that deprivation to this planet and its inhabitants (or the inhabitants of any other, given the universality of the message).

My favorite sermons in the collection are “The Death of Evil Upon the Seashore,” alluding to Exodus, and “Shattered Dreams,” which, I imagine, we can ALL relate to one way or another (I know that I can). However, a passage that resonates for me at this time in my own life comes from another sermon, “Antidotes for Fear.”

Rev. Dr. King, Jr., himself, writes in the preface to Strength to Love:

“I have been rather reluctant to have a volume of sermons printed. My misgivings have grown out of the fact that a sermon is not an essay to be read but a discourse to be heard. It should be a convincing appeal to a listening congregation. Therefore, a sermon is directed toward the listening ear rather than the reading eye.”

I can imagine the impact of bearing witness to a sermon by Rev. Dr. King, Jr. in person. Actually, I can’t. That privilege only belongs to those who were there, but his words still resonate and we are ALL privileged that a work like Strength to Love exists to document them in the manner in which they are done in the book. I know that I am grateful for it.

The passage in question resonates for me, in particular, however, because of its universal applicability and its applicability to me, personally. In “Antidotes for Fear” Rev. Dr. King, Jr. writes:

“Courage takes the fear produced by a definite object into itself and thereby conquers the fear involved… This courageous self-affirmation, which is surely a remedy for fear, is not selfishness, for self-affirmation includes both a proper self-love and a properly propositioned love of others.”

I found this passage inspiring. Specifically, the notion that speaking our minds, and being assertive, may cause fear, either because of a fear of conflict or of disrupting conventional ideas of what may, or may not, be considered socially acceptable in speech and interpersonal communication. However, my thoughts are these: By speaking our minds, whatever that thing might be, we are asserting our true selves and that should never be avoided. My thinking is this, as I wrote in the margins upon reading this passage:

This is true because the natural state of being is to love and have empathy. By having the courage to affirm ourselves, our natural being, we are enabling ourselves to love and have empathy. It is not selfish. True self-love enables love.

This was a reassuring thing to recognize because, very often, I have fear that I might be violating some socially-recognized conventional way of speaking or “acting,” but that’s just it… To engage in any other behavior is to “act.” It is only by being true to ourselves that we can truly ACT, without hesitation, in more fully embodying the truth within us and who we truly are. And that should never be second-guessed. Otherwise, our own true self-love and capacity for empathy for others may be compromised. As Rev. Dr. King, Jr. paraphrased the psychologist and philosopher Erich Fromm, “the right kind of self-love and the right kind of love of others are interdependent.” Almost by definition one cannot exist without the other.

I hope that I have the courage to continue to live by this conviction. And I hope you do, too. I believe a little bit of self-assertiveness can change the world. God knows it is needed. Loggerheads and all. And then some. Thank you.